The Loser

James wants to know why he gets so messy. He said he feels like a loser. I can relate. Last night I met up with Freddy Lou and Woodsy at Rock Bottom for the Bachelor Fireman Auction, benefiting the Washington Burn Foundation. It was also the night Rock Bottom was introducing a new beer, Fire Chief Ale. Alas, the firemen cancelled. Which was just as well, it would be hard to explain to Carlitos that I’d paid money to have a date with a hunky young fireman. But the good news was that they gave away free pints of the beer. It was ok beer, but being free made it taste great. Woodsy, Freddy Lou and I pined away for the firemen over free beer, and then headed up to Changes.

Freddy took his donor-cycle, and Woodsy and I resolved to take the bus. We started walking down to 3rd to catch the 16 to Wallingford when a cab went by. That’s all it took, I waved him down and we split the fare. It was much better than the bus.

At this point I had 3 strong beers under my belt and had only eaten a small lunch. No breakfast. As a rule I don’t skip meals, so I was starving at Rock Bottom. Until I got that third beer in me, then the hunger retreated to the back of my mind and I just wanted to drink. Not a good sign.

Seth was at work, and Jeff was there for his birthday with his boyfriend, Gaysian Jeff. It was also trivia night at Changes, so we had plenty to keep us busy. Woodsy and I won a round of trivia, good for $24, and we met a random guy who did a tarot reading for each of us. Mine was chillingly accurate.

Since it was Jeff’s birthday, we had to do shots. Plenty of shots. And in between, Seth kept my beer glass full. I had been planning to get some food at some point in the evening, but by the time we did a third round of Tuaca shots, I had forgotten about food. In fact, I had forgotten about everything. I ended up staggering around Changes talking to people randomly and slamming beers like there was no tomorrow. And while I was staggering around, apparently I set down my phone somewhere and forgot it.

At some point, and I couldn’t tell you when, Joey and Woodsy and Ben and I all piled into Joey’s car, and went to R Place. I was there long enough to stagger upstairs and survey the crowd before I stumbled back downstairs and headed home to Carlitos. Amazingly, I’m not hungover today, but I’m really missing my phone.